As I read the letters, I read them from people I never talk to anymore.
Honestly, it made me so sad. I have had close high school friends almost become strangers to me. Half the time, they have some blame, either they weren't that good of a friend, or they were a bit obsessive.
But I also have blame. Whether I never reached out to them, or I was a bad friend, I know I am not innocent by any means.
Sometimes, I suck.
I feel like I find reasons to push people away sometimes. And that sucks. I suck.
I was reading these letters of people telling me how kind and generous I was, and how I was such a good friend.
Now I feel like none of that resonates with me. I have become a shitty friends that has not reached out to any of them anymore.
I want to go back to the way I once was, and reach out to friends.
I wanna be better.
And to any past friends that for some reason still read my blog, I just wanna apologize for not being the best to you. I am sorry if I put you through crap or hurt you in any way, I am so sorry.
I am gonna be better. I need to be less selfish in life, and look out for my friends.
Add that to the resolutions.